Finding Your Way Through the Holidays: A Guide to Coping with Anxiety, Depression, and Grief
by Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW
The holiday season arrives each year wrapped in expectations of joy, connection, and celebration. Yet for many of us, this time brings a complex mix of emotions that can feel isolating when the world around us seems to sparkle with festive cheer. Whether you're navigating anxiety about family gatherings, managing depression that deepens in winter's darkness, or carrying grief through a season that highlights absence, your experience is valid and you are not alone. This guide offers evidence-based tools and compassionate support for the very real challenges that can emerge during the holidays.
Navigating Holiday Anxiety: Parties, Family Events, and Social Expectations
The holidays can trigger anxiety in ways that feel overwhelming and unavoidable. Social obligations multiply, family dynamics intensify, and the pressure to create perfect moments collides with our human limitations. You might find your heart racing before a party, your mind spinning with worry about family interactions, or your body tense with the weight of expectations you didn't choose. Research shows that holiday-related anxiety affects a significant portion of the population. According to the American Psychiatric Association's 2024 Healthy Minds Monthly Poll, 28% of Americans reported experiencing more stress related to the holiday season than the previous year, with top stressors including affording holiday gifts (46%), grieving a loss or missing a loved one (47%), and dealing with challenging family dynamics (35%) (American Psychiatric Association, 2024). Understanding that your anxiety is a normal response to abnormal pressure can be the first step toward managing it with compassion.
Holiday anxiety often stems from several sources that compound one another. There's anticipatory anxiety about social situations, particularly if you're navigating difficult family relationships or feeling socially overwhelmed. Financial stress adds another layer, as the pressure to buy gifts and participate in expensive activities can trigger worry about money and worth. For those with trauma histories, family gatherings can reactivate old wounds, bringing protective anxiety that once kept you safe but now feels consuming. Performance anxiety around creating the perfect holiday experience, being the perfect host, or meeting others' expectations can leave you feeling like you're constantly being evaluated.
Tools for Managing Holiday Anxiety
• The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique: When anxiety spikes at a gathering, use this sensory grounding exercise. Identify 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. This technique, rooted in mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), helps anchor you in the present moment and interrupts the anxiety spiral by engaging your observational mind rather than your worried mind. Research demonstrates that mindfulness-based interventions significantly reduce anxiety symptoms across various populations (Goldberg et al., 2022).
• Strategic Exit Planning: Before attending events, create a concrete exit strategy. Drive yourself when possible, identify safe spaces to take breaks, and give yourself permission to leave early. Having an escape route reduces the trapped feeling that amplifies anxiety. Research on perceived control shows that simply knowing you have options can significantly reduce physiological stress responses and improve emotional well-being (Gallagher et al., 2014).
• Boundary Scripts: Prepare and practice specific phrases for common anxiety triggers. For intrusive questions: 'I appreciate your interest, but I'd rather not discuss that today.' For pressure to stay longer: 'I need to take care of myself, so I'll be leaving soon.' For unwanted advice: 'Thank you for thinking of me. I'm handling things the way that works best for me.' Having these scripts ready reduces the cognitive load of figuring out responses in the moment when anxiety is already high.
• Box Breathing for Nervous System Regulation: Practice this technique before and during stressful situations: breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, breathe out for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, and repeat. This activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which counteracts the fight-or-flight response. Studies show that controlled breathing exercises can reduce cortisol levels and increase heart rate variability, both markers of reduced physiological stress (Zaccaro et al., 2018).
• The 'Observe and Describe' Exercise: When you notice anxiety rising, silently observe and describe what's happening without judgment: 'I notice my shoulders are tense. I notice my thoughts are racing about what Uncle Bob might say. I notice anxiety in my chest.' This practice, drawn from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), creates distance between you and your anxiety, reminding you that you are not your anxiety—you are the one observing it. Evidence supports DBT skills training as effective for reducing anxiety and improving emotion regulation (Neacsiu et al., 2014).
• Scheduled Worry Time: Set aside 15-20 minutes each day during the holiday season specifically for worrying. When anxious thoughts arise outside this time, acknowledge them and redirect: 'I'll think about this during my worry time at 7pm.' This technique, supported by research on cognitive behavioral therapy, helps contain anxiety rather than letting it pervade your entire day. Recent meta-analyses confirm CBT's effectiveness for anxiety disorders (Carpenter et al., 2018).
• The Power of 'Maybe': Challenge catastrophic thinking by replacing 'what if' worries with 'maybe.' Instead of 'What if they judge me?' try 'Maybe they'll judge me, or maybe they won't even notice, or maybe they'll be kind.' This opens up possibilities beyond the worst-case scenario your anxiety is fixated on, engaging the part of your brain that can think flexibly rather than just react fearfully.
When the Lights Feel Dim: Coping with Depression During the Holidays
Depression during the holidays carries a unique weight. While the world celebrates, you might feel disconnected from joy, burdened by the gap between how you think you should feel and how you actually do. The cultural narrative that December should be 'the most wonderful time of the year' can make depression feel even more isolating, as if something is fundamentally wrong with you for not experiencing the prescribed happiness. Multiple recent surveys confirm this phenomenon, with one 2024 study finding that 81% of people report increased stress during the holiday season, and 37.5% report worsening mental health during this time (Sleepopolis Holiday Stress Survey, 2024).
Depression often manifests differently during the holidays than at other times of year. You might experience heightened fatigue that makes even basic holiday tasks feel insurmountable, social withdrawal as gatherings feel overwhelming or pointless, increased feelings of worthlessness when comparing yourself to others' seemingly perfect celebrations, or a profound sense of emptiness even when surrounded by people and festivities. The forced cheerfulness of the season can create a painful dissonance between your internal experience and external expectations, leaving you feeling alienated from both the holiday spirit and from others who seem to embody it effortlessly.
Tools for Managing Holiday Depression
• Behavioral Activation Through Micro-Actions: Depression tells us to withdraw, but isolation often deepens the darkness. Behavioral activation, a core component of cognitive behavioral therapy for depression, involves choosing small, specific actions even when you don't feel like it. Start impossibly small: text one friend, walk around the block once, light a single candle. These micro-actions create momentum and can begin to shift depressive inertia. A comprehensive 2023 meta-analysis examining 22 randomized controlled trials found that individual behavioral activation produces significant improvements in depression, with effect sizes comparable to other established treatments (Cuijpers et al., 2023). Recent research in 2024 continues to demonstrate behavioral activation's effectiveness across diverse populations and settings (Haakana et al., 2024; Saberi et al., 2024).
• Permission to Opt Out: Give yourself explicit permission to decline invitations and skip traditions that feel too heavy. Depression depletes your energy reserves; attending every gathering can leave you more depleted. Create a simple statement you can use: 'I'm not up for that this year, but I appreciate you thinking of me.' Protecting your energy is not selfishness—it's survival. You can revisit traditions when you have capacity; they don't disappear because you need to rest this season.
• The Depression Toolkit List: Create a written list of things that have helped even slightly when depression feels heavy. This might include taking a shower, watching a specific comfort show, calling a particular friend, sitting in sunlight for 10 minutes, or listening to a certain playlist. When depression clouds your thinking, this external resource can guide you toward small helpful actions when your brain can't generate options on its own.
• Redefining 'Good Enough': Challenge the holiday perfectionism that depression makes impossible. Lower your standards radically and intentionally. Store-bought cookies are good enough. A simple text is good enough. Showing up in sweatpants is good enough. The goal is survival and small moments of connection, not Pinterest-worthy perfection. Research on self-compassion shows that being kind to yourself about your limitations actually improves mental health outcomes more than harsh self-criticism (Neff et al., 2023).
• Opposite Action for Social Withdrawal: This DBT skill involves doing the opposite of what depression urges when the emotion doesn't fit the facts. If depression tells you to isolate but you know connection might help, choose one brief social interaction: a 15-minute coffee, a phone call with a time limit, a walk with a trusted friend. Keep it brief and structured so it doesn't overwhelm, but create small points of connection to counter depression's push toward total isolation.
• Gentle Structure and Routine: Depression thrives in formlessness. Create minimal structure: wake up at roughly the same time, eat at regular intervals, go to bed at a consistent hour. This isn't about rigid schedules but about creating anchors in your day that your body and mind can rely on. Even during holiday chaos, maintaining some routine helps stabilize mood and provides predictability that can feel grounding when everything else feels uncertain.
• The 'Both/And' Practice: Depression often presents in absolutes: everything is terrible, you feel nothing but emptiness, there's no point to anything. Practice holding both truths: 'I am deeply depressed AND I managed to get out of bed today.' 'The holidays feel meaningless to me AND someone I love finds joy in them.' 'I am struggling AND I am doing the best I can.' This cognitive flexibility, central to Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, helps you hold the complexity of your experience rather than collapsing into depression's narrow narrative (Hayes & Hofmann, 2022).
Holding Space for Grief: Navigating Loss During the Holidays
Grief and the holidays exist in painful tension. The season emphasizes togetherness precisely when loss feels most acute, filling social gatherings with conspicuous absences and transforming beloved traditions into sharp reminders of what and who is gone. Whether you're grieving a death, the end of a relationship, or estrangement from family, the holidays can intensify your pain in ways that feel unbearable. Research on grief shows that holidays and anniversaries can trigger acute grief responses even years after a loss, a phenomenon called 'anniversary reactions' that is both normal and deeply challenging (Eisma & Stroebe, 2022).
Grieving After a Death
The first holiday season after losing someone you love can feel like moving through a world that has fundamentally changed while everyone else carries on as if nothing happened. Their empty chair at the table, the traditions you shared that now feel hollow, the impulse to call them before remembering they're gone—these moments can crash over you with renewed intensity during the holidays. Anticipatory grief before the holidays arrives too, as you dread the approaching season and all the ways it will highlight their absence.
Grief after death doesn't follow neat timelines or stages. You might feel fine one moment and devastated the next. You might laugh at a memory and then feel guilty for experiencing joy. You might want to honor your loved one while also wanting to escape reminders of their absence. All of these responses are valid expressions of love and loss coexisting in your heart.
Tools for Grieving After a Death
• Continuing Bonds: Modern grief theory recognizes that you don't have to 'let go' of your loved one—you can maintain connection while integrating their absence. Create new rituals that honor them: light a candle in their memory, share their favorite meal, tell stories about them, include a chair or place setting in their honor. Research on continuing bonds shows that maintaining connection to deceased loved ones is often healthy and healing rather than pathological. A comprehensive 2023 systematic review examining 79 studies found that continuing bonds can provide comfort, support identity transformation, and facilitate meaning-making, though their impact varies based on how they're integrated into daily life (Hewson et al., 2023). Recent research from 2024 continues to affirm the value of maintaining adapted relationships with deceased loved ones across various cultural contexts (Hopf et al., 2024).
• Permission to Change Traditions: You don't have to maintain every tradition if it's too painful. It's okay to skip the family gathering, travel somewhere different, or create entirely new ways of marking the season. Grief gives you permission to prioritize your healing over others' expectations. You can honor both your loved one's memory and your own need for what feels manageable this year.
• The 'Talk to Them' Exercise: Write letters to your loved one, speak to them aloud in private, or maintain an ongoing journal addressed to them. Express what you wish you could say, share what's happening in your life, tell them how much you miss them. This practice, supported by narrative therapy approaches to grief, allows continued relationship and expression of feelings that might otherwise have nowhere to go.
• Anticipate and Plan for Grief Surges: Identify specific moments you know will be hard—when you set the table, when you hear their favorite song, when you pass their empty chair. Make a plan for these moments: step outside for air, have a friend on standby to text, keep tissues accessible, give yourself permission to leave if needed. Anticipating grief doesn't make it hurt less, but it can help you feel less ambushed by it.
• Grief Bursts and Wave Riding: Grief often arrives in waves—intense surges of feeling that can hit unexpectedly. When a wave comes, practice riding it rather than fighting it. Notice it, name it ('This is grief about missing Mom at Christmas'), breathe through it, and trust it will crest and recede. Trying to suppress grief waves often intensifies them; allowing them to move through you, while painful, helps them pass more completely.
Grieving After a Relationship Ends
The end of a significant relationship—whether through divorce, breakup, or the dissolution of a friendship—brings its own form of grief that the holidays can intensify. You're mourning not just the person but the future you imagined together, the identity you held within that relationship, and the shared traditions that now belong to a past you can't return to. This grief is often complicated by the fact that the person is still alive, sometimes visible on social media apparently moving on, maybe even attending the same family gatherings or sharing mutual friends.
Relationship loss during the holidays can feel particularly acute because couple-focused traditions, family questions about your relationship status, and the cultural emphasis on romantic love can all highlight the absence of what you've lost. You might grieve the person while simultaneously feeling angry at them, creating an emotional complexity that's hard to navigate. Ambiguous loss—when someone is physically absent but psychologically present, or vice versa—can be especially challenging to process.
Tools for Grieving After a Relationship Ends
• Mourning the Future That Won't Happen: Name and grieve the specific futures you're losing: the holidays you won't share, the inside jokes that are now just yours, the plans you made that won't come to fruition. Write them down, speak them to a trusted friend, or express them in whatever form feels right. Acknowledging these losses validates that you're not just mourning a person but a whole imagined life.
• Creating New Traditions for Yourself: Actively design new ways to spend the holidays that are about you and what brings you comfort. This might mean traveling solo, hosting Friendsgiving, volunteering, or creating entirely new rituals that aren't tied to your past relationship. These new traditions can feel strange at first, but they help create a new normal rather than just living in the shadow of what used to be.
• The 'What I'm Not Losing' List: While grieving what you've lost is important, also acknowledge what remains or what you're gaining. Freedom to make your own choices, friendships that have deepened, space to discover who you are outside that relationship, relief from conflict or pain. This isn't about toxic positivity or denying your grief—it's about holding the full picture of your experience.
• Boundary Language for Invasive Questions: Prepare responses for the inevitable 'Where's [ex-partner]?' or 'Are you seeing anyone?' questions. Simple and firm works: 'We've separated, and I'm not discussing it today.' 'That's personal, but thank you for asking.' 'I'm focusing on myself right now.' You don't owe anyone the story of your loss, especially not during a holiday gathering.
• The Remembering and Releasing Ritual: Create a personal ritual to honor what the relationship was while releasing what it's no longer. This might involve writing a letter you don't send, burning symbolic items, creating art, or a private ceremony. Rituals help mark transitions and can provide closure that daily life doesn't always offer, giving your grief a container and your loss a witness.
Grieving After Estrangement
Estrangement from family members brings a form of grief that society often doesn't recognize or validate. You're mourning the absence of people who are still living, sometimes people who will be at family gatherings you're not attending or who have replaced you in traditions that once included you. The holidays can make estrangement feel especially painful because this is when families are supposed to come together, and your intentional distance or exclusion stands in sharp contrast to cultural narratives about familial love and forgiveness.
Grieving estrangement is complicated by guilt, shame, and self-doubt. You might question whether you made the right choice, feel pressure from others to reconcile, or struggle with the fact that you're grieving people who hurt you—people you had to protect yourself from by creating distance. This grief often includes mourning the family you deserved but never had, the parent who couldn't show up for you, or the sibling relationship that became toxic. Disenfranchised grief—grief that others don't recognize as legitimate—can leave you feeling isolated in your loss.
Tools for Grieving After Estrangement
• Validating Your Decision: Remind yourself that estrangement doesn't happen because you're unforgiving or difficult—it happens because staying in relationship caused more harm than distance does. You made a decision to protect yourself, and that decision deserves respect, especially from yourself. When guilt arises, return to the reasons you needed distance. Trust that you know your situation better than anyone else.
• Chosen Family Traditions: Build intentional community with people who see you, value you, and treat you with kindness. Create traditions with friends who have become family, partners who honor your boundaries, or communities that accept you fully. Chosen family is not a consolation prize for 'real family'—it's often the deepest, most authentic connection because it's based on mutual care rather than obligation.
• Grieving the Fantasy Parent or Family: Part of estrangement grief involves mourning not just who your family members are but who you needed them to be. This fantasy version of your parent or sibling—the one who would apologize, change, or finally see you—may never materialize. Grieving this fantasy allows you to accept reality, which paradoxically can bring relief alongside the sadness. You can mourn what you deserved without maintaining false hope that keeps you tethered to people who can't or won't change.
• Responding to Pressure to Reconcile: Others who don't understand your situation may pressure you to 'make peace' during the holidays. Prepare clear boundaries: 'I appreciate your concern, but this is my decision to make.' 'My estrangement protects my wellbeing, and I'm not open to discussing reconciliation.' 'I understand this is hard for you to understand, but I need you to respect my choice.' You don't owe anyone explanations or justifications for protecting yourself.
• The Empty Chair Ritual: Create a private ritual that acknowledges the absence of estranged family members during the holidays. This might involve writing them a letter you don't send, having a conversation with an empty chair expressing what you wish you could say, or creating art that represents your grief. These rituals help process ambiguous loss and give your complicated feelings a place to exist safely.
When Winter's Darkness Deepens: Understanding and Coping with Seasonal Affective Disorder
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), sometimes called seasonal depression, is a type of depression that follows a seasonal pattern, most commonly beginning in fall and continuing through winter. This isn't just 'winter blues' or a preference for sunshine—it's a clinical condition with biological underpinnings related to reduced sunlight exposure affecting your circadian rhythms, serotonin levels, and melatonin production. Research estimates that approximately 5% of adults in the United States experience SAD, with rates higher in northern latitudes where winter days are significantly shorter (Rosenthal, 2022).
SAD symptoms often include persistent low mood, loss of interest in activities you usually enjoy, low energy and fatigue, difficulty concentrating, changes in sleep patterns (often oversleeping), changes in appetite (often craving carbohydrates), weight gain, and feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness. What makes SAD particularly challenging during the holidays is that it peaks precisely when you're expected to be social, celebratory, and energetic. The mismatch between your depleted internal state and external expectations can intensify both the depression and the shame around it.
Tools for Managing Seasonal Affective Disorder
• Light Therapy as First-Line Treatment: Light therapy using a specialized lightbox (10,000 lux) for 20-30 minutes each morning is one of the most effective treatments for SAD. The bright light helps regulate your circadian rhythm and can increase serotonin production. Position the lightbox at eye level about 16-24 inches away while you eat breakfast, read, or work. Most people begin noticing improvement within one to two weeks. A comprehensive 2024 network meta-analysis of 21 randomized controlled trials involving 1,037 participants found that phototherapy was significantly more effective than other interventions or control therapies for treating SAD, with substantial effect sizes (Li et al., 2024). A 2024 systematic review examining different wavelengths of light found that white light therapy was most effective, followed by green, blue, and red light (Wang et al., 2024).
• Maximizing Natural Light Exposure: Get outside during daylight hours whenever possible, even on cloudy days—outdoor light is still significantly brighter than indoor lighting. Open curtains and blinds, sit near windows, and arrange your workspace to maximize natural light exposure. A 20-minute morning walk, even in overcast conditions, can help regulate your circadian rhythm and improve mood.
• Vitamin D Supplementation: Reduced sunlight exposure in winter can lead to vitamin D deficiency, which is associated with depression. Many mental health professionals recommend vitamin D supplementation during winter months, typically 1000-2000 IU daily, though you should consult with your healthcare provider about appropriate dosing for your situation. Studies suggest vitamin D supplementation may help improve SAD symptoms (Kerr et al., 2015; Menon et al., 2020).
• Exercise as Mood Regulation: Physical activity, particularly outdoors during daylight hours, can significantly improve SAD symptoms. Exercise increases endorphins, improves sleep quality, reduces stress hormones, and when done outdoors, combines the benefits of movement with light exposure. Even 20-30 minutes of moderate exercise several times per week can make a measurable difference. Winter activities like skiing, snowshoeing, or simply walking in daylight can be particularly beneficial. Research demonstrates exercise's effectiveness for depressive disorders, including seasonal depression (Schuch et al., 2016).
• Maintaining Consistent Sleep Schedule: SAD often disrupts sleep patterns, leading to oversleeping and difficulty waking. Establish and maintain consistent sleep and wake times, even on weekends. Use your light therapy immediately upon waking to help reset your circadian rhythm. Avoid napping during the day, which can worsen nighttime sleep. Good sleep hygiene is particularly important for managing SAD, as disrupted circadian rhythms are central to the disorder.
• Planning Ahead for Winter: If you experience SAD annually, start light therapy and other interventions in early fall before symptoms fully develop. Preventive treatment can reduce severity or prevent symptoms entirely. Schedule activities you enjoy throughout winter, plan trips to sunnier locations if possible, and arrange social connections in advance so you're not trying to organize support when depression has already set in.
• Acknowledging the Biological Reality: Remind yourself that SAD is not a character flaw, laziness, or negativity—it's a biological response to reduced light exposure that affects brain chemistry. This understanding can reduce shame and help you approach treatment practically rather than morally. You wouldn't blame yourself for needing glasses to see; similarly, you shouldn't blame yourself for needing interventions to manage a brain that's responding predictably to environmental changes.
Resources for Additional Support
If you're struggling with anxiety, depression, grief, or seasonal affective disorder during the holidays, please know that professional support is available and can make a significant difference. The following resources provide various forms of help, from immediate crisis support to longer-term therapeutic care. You deserve support during difficult times, and reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline provides 24/7 free and confidential support for people in distress and crisis resources. You can call or text 988 to reach trained counselors who can provide immediate support, crisis intervention, and connections to local resources. The service is available nationwide and offers support in both English and Spanish, with translation services available for additional languages. This resource is particularly valuable if you're experiencing thoughts of self-harm, feeling overwhelmed by grief or depression, or need someone to talk to during a crisis moment during the holidays.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Helpline offers information, referrals, and support to individuals and families affected by mental health conditions. You can reach them at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) Monday through Friday, 10am to 10pm EST. NAMI also offers extensive online resources, including information about specific mental health conditions, treatment options, and local support groups. Their website (nami.org) includes educational materials about anxiety disorders, depression, and grief that can help you better understand what you're experiencing. NAMI support groups, both in-person and online, can provide community with others who understand mental health challenges.
The Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) provides a therapist directory to help you find mental health professionals specializing in anxiety and depression treatment. Their website (adaa.org) includes evidence-based resources about various anxiety disorders, depression, and effective treatment approaches. ADAA offers free webinars, blog posts written by mental health professionals, and self-help tools that can complement professional treatment. Their resources specifically address holiday-related anxiety and depression, providing practical strategies for managing symptoms during this challenging season.
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7 treatment referral and information service available in English and Spanish. You can reach them at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). SAMHSA helps connect individuals and families facing mental health and substance use disorders with local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations. They can provide information about sliding-scale or free treatment options, which can be particularly helpful if cost is a barrier to accessing care. Their website (samhsa.gov) also offers extensive resources about mental health conditions and evidence-based treatments.
The Centre for Complicated Grief at Columbia University offers specialized treatment and resources for those experiencing persistent, intense grief that doesn't improve over time. While grief is a normal response to loss, some people experience what's called complicated grief or prolonged grief disorder, where the intensity of grief doesn't diminish with time and significantly impairs functioning. Their website (complicatedgrief.columbia.edu) provides information about this condition and treatment options, including their evidence-based Complicated Grief Treatment. They can also help connect you with therapists trained in grief-specific interventions, which can be particularly valuable if you're navigating loss during the holidays.
GriefShare is an international support group network specifically for those grieving the death of a loved one. These Christ-centered support groups meet in churches and community centers throughout the year, with special sessions often available during the holiday season when grief can feel most acute. You can find local groups through their website (griefshare.org). While GriefShare has a Christian foundation, many people find value in the community and structured support regardless of their religious background. The groups combine video seminars, group discussion, and personal workbooks to help people process grief in community with others who understand loss.
Psychology Today's therapist directory is one of the most comprehensive online resources for finding mental health professionals in your area. You can search by location, insurance accepted, issues treated, and therapeutic approach. The directory includes detailed profiles of therapists, including their training, specializations, and treatment philosophies, helping you find someone whose approach aligns with your needs. Many therapists listed offer sliding-scale fees, and you can filter specifically for providers who work with anxiety, depression, grief, or trauma. The website also includes extensive articles about mental health topics that can provide education and validation as you navigate your experiences.
For those experiencing Seasonal Affective Disorder, the Center for Environmental Therapeutics provides detailed information about light therapy, dawn simulation, and other evidence-based treatments for SAD. Their website (cet.org) offers guidance on choosing appropriate light therapy equipment, proper timing and use, and combining light therapy with other treatments. They maintain a directory of healthcare providers knowledgeable about SAD treatment and offer self-assessment tools to help you understand whether your symptoms might be seasonal depression. Their resources can help you implement effective interventions before symptoms become severe.
The Estranged Stories project provides community and validation for those navigating family estrangement, a type of loss that often goes unrecognized during the holiday season when family connection is emphasized. Their website and social media presence offer stories from others who have chosen or been forced into estrangement, helping reduce the isolation that often accompanies this experience. While not a mental health service, this resource can provide the sense of community and understanding that's often missing when you're grieving estrangement, particularly during holidays when societal pressure to reconcile with family can feel overwhelming.
Crisis Text Line provides free, 24/7 crisis support via text message. Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a trained crisis counselor. This service can be particularly helpful if you're more comfortable texting than calling, if you need support in a situation where a phone call isn't private or practical, or if anxiety makes phone conversations difficult. Crisis counselors are trained to help with a wide range of issues, including anxiety, depression, grief, and thoughts of self-harm. The service maintains strict confidentiality and can provide immediate support and resources during difficult moments.
Remember that seeking help is not a sign of failure but an act of self-care and courage. Whether you reach out to a crisis line, join a support group, start therapy, or simply tell someone you trust that you're struggling, each step toward support matters. The holidays can be genuinely difficult when you're managing mental health challenges or grief, and you don't have to navigate these difficulties alone. Professional support, community resources, and connection with others who understand can make the weight feel more bearable and help you develop tools for managing both this holiday season and those to come.
References
American Psychiatric Association. (2024). One quarter of Americans say they are more stressed this holiday season than in 2023, citing financial concerns and missing loved ones [Press release]. Retrieved from https://www.psychiatry.org/news-room/news-releases
Carpenter, J. K., Andrews, L. A., Witcraft, S. M., Powers, M. B., Smits, J. A. J., & Hofmann, S. G. (2018). Cognitive behavioral therapy for anxiety and related disorders: A meta-analysis of randomized placebo-controlled trials. Depression and Anxiety, 35(6), 502-514.
Cuijpers, P., Karyotaki, E., Harrer, M., & Stikkelbroek, Y. (2023). Individual behavioral activation in the treatment of depression: A meta-analysis. Psychotherapy Research, 33(7), 886-897.
Eisma, M. C., & Stroebe, M. S. (2022). Rumination following bereavement: An overview. Bereavement Care, 41(2), 85-94.
Gallagher, M. W., Bentley, K. H., & Barlow, D. H. (2014). Perceived control and vulnerability to anxiety disorders: A meta-analytic review. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 38(6), 571-584.
Goldberg, S. B., Tucker, R. P., Greene, P. A., Davidson, R. J., Wampold, B. E., Kearney, D. J., & Simpson, T. L. (2022). Mindfulness-based interventions for psychiatric disorders: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Clinical Psychology Review, 59, 52-60.
Haakana, R., Rosenström, T., Parkkinen, L., Tuomisto, M. T., & Isometsä, E. (2024). Effectiveness of an add-on brief group behavioral activation treatment for depression in psychiatric care: A randomized clinical trial. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 15, 1284363.
Hayes, S. C., & Hofmann, S. G. (2022). Process-based CBT: The science and core clinical competencies of cognitive behavioral therapy. New Harbinger Publications.
Hewson, H., Galbraith, N., Jones, C., & Heath, G. (2023). The impact of continuing bonds following bereavement: A systematic review. Death Studies, 48(10), 1001-1014.
Hopf, D., Eckstein, M., Ditzen, B., & Aguilar-Raab, C. (2024). Still with me? Assessing the persisting relationship to a deceased loved-one: Validation of the 'Continuing Bonds Scale' in a German population. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 89(2), 623-648.
Kerr, D. C., Zava, D. T., Piper, W. T., Saturn, S. R., Frei, B., & Gombart, A. F. (2015). Associations between vitamin D levels and depressive symptoms in healthy young adult women. Psychiatry Research, 227(1), 46-51.
Li, M., Duan, S., Qin, F., Chen, H., Zheng, X., Liu, M., & Tu, A. (2024). Treatment measures for seasonal affective disorder: A network meta-analysis. Journal of Affective Disorders, 350, 536-544.
Menon, V., Kar, S. K., Suthar, N., & Nebhinani, N. (2020). Vitamin D and depression: A critical appraisal of the evidence and future directions. Indian Journal of Psychological Medicine, 42(1), 11-21.
Neacsiu, A. D., Eberle, J. W., Kramer, R., Wiesmann, T., & Linehan, M. M. (2014). Dialectical behavior therapy skills for transdiagnostic emotion dysregulation: A pilot randomized controlled trial. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 59, 40-51.
Neff, K. D., Knox, M. C., Long, P., & Gregory, K. (2023). Caring for others without losing yourself: An adaptation of the mindful self-compassion program for healthcare communities. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 79(2), 352-371.
Rosenthal, N. E. (2022). Winter blues: Everything you need to know to beat seasonal affective disorder (4th ed.). Guilford Press.
Saberi, S., Ahmadi, R., Khakpoor, S., Ghadampour, E., & Ghazanfari, F. (2024). Comparing the effectiveness of behavioral activation in group vs. self-help format for reducing depression, repetitive thoughts, and enhancing performance of patients with major depressive disorder: A randomized clinical trial. BMC Psychiatry, 24, 516.
Schuch, F. B., Vancampfort, D., Richards, J., Rosenbaum, S., Ward, P. B., & Stubbs, B. (2016). Exercise as a treatment for depression: A meta-analysis adjusting for publication bias. Journal of Psychiatric Research, 77, 42-51.
Sleepopolis. (2024). Holiday stress survey 2024. Retrieved from https://sleepopolis.com/education/holiday-stress-survey-2024/
Wang, S., Wu, Y., Zuo, Z., Zhao, Y., & Wang, K. (2024). Effectiveness of visible light for seasonal affective disorder: A systematic review and network meta-analysis. Medicine, 103(28), e38819.
Zaccaro, A., Piarulli, A., Laurino, M., Garbella, E., Menicucci, D., Neri, B., & Gemignani, A. (2018). How breath-control can change your life: A systematic review on psycho-physiological correlates of slow breathing. Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, 12, 353.
